A Simple Practice to Manage Your Energy as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) or Empath
Are you a Highly Sensitive Person or empath? Do you struggle to manage your energy in relationships? Do you sometimes feel depleted? Here’s a simple exercise you can use to bring more mindfulness to your relational energy.
First, just notice. When you’re in conversation with another person, notice how much of your energy is focused on the other person, and how much is focused on you. First, try putting 100% of your energy and focus on the other person. Really focus on them. Stay with that for a minute or so. Then, pull back and put 100% on yourself. Notice how your body feels, notice your breathing, your emotions.
Next, experiment with different ratios — 50% on the other person / 50% on yourself, 60/40, 90/10 — so that you get a sense of what it feels like to extend your energy outwards and what it feels like to pull it back in to yourself. You may want to practice this in a low-stakes situation, such as with a friend, to get the hang of it. What does it feel like to have your energy hovering evenly between you and the other person? Do you feel more comfortable with more of your energy on yourself, or on the other person? Experiment with this and see what comes up.
Try it in different situations. You can also do this mindfulness practice with your relationship with various objects in your life, such as your phone, your food, your car, etc. When you’re scrolling social media, see if you can take a breath and notice what percent of your energy and focus are on your phone. Likely, more that 50% will be on your screen and the content. You can even try it right now: As you read this, how much of your focus is on your screen and engaging with these words energetically? See if you can gently pull some of that energy back to your body. Just play with it and notice how you feel.
This simple exercise can bring more awareness into how much of our energy we extend outside of ourselves. There’s nothing wrong with extending our energy, but it’s helpful to have mindfulness around this, especially if we are sensitive or empathic. Highly Sensitive People can be more prone to dispersing our energy in a way that depletes us, so it’s important to be aware of our own energy. The intention with this practice is to strengthen your ability to choose how much of your energy you want to put where at any given time. Try it out and see what you notice!
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